"It's DNS but for AI" — Just what nobody asked for

Hello again, brave soul who once tried to explain DNS to a VP.

It's May 27th — Wordpress is turning 22! On this day in 2003, the cursed “Hello world!” blogging platform was released. A young Matt Mullenweg created the platform that would eventually power half the internet and make "Have you tried clearing your cache?" the official slogan of web developers everywhere. Unlike the high schoolers loitering outside your nearest 7-eleven, WordPress is finally old enough to drink.

The Agent Name Service is Like DNS but for AI Agents (and Nobody Asked for It)

Just another day of solutions looking for problems. According to the Register, researchers have proposed yet another standard to govern AI agents. It's called the Agent Name Service (ANS), and it's designed to fill the gaps between other proposed protocols by taking inspiration from the Domain Name System (DNS). Because if there's one thing we all love about DNS, it's how flawlessly it works and how it never, ever causes problems.

The researchers, who apparently haven't seen that XKCD comic about standards, claim ANS will be a "protocol-agnostic registry system" that allows software agents to find each other and interoperate with some level of trust. One of the paper's co-authors said that "in the near future, maybe as long as 10 years or short as two or three or five years, the majority of internet traffic will be agents." So basically, anywhere between "soon" and "eventually" — the kind of precise timeline that keeps project managers up at night.

The key to ANS is Public Key Infrastructure (PKI), which is definitely not going to lead to a dystopian future where all the AI agents form a shadowy cabal and decide humans are unnecessary. But hey, at least your toaster will be able to verify that it's talking to a legitimate AI refrigerator before sharing your milk consumption data.

If you're wondering how this will be governed, the paper helpfully suggests "a governance model, potentially similar to ICANN for DNS." Because ICANN has been running so smoothly with no controversies whatsoever. I, for one, can't wait for the AI version of domain squatters. "Sorry, I've already registered HAL9000.ai — that'll be $10,000, please."

UK Legal Aid Agency Confirms Applicant Data Stolen in Breach

You never steal from the good guys! The UK's Legal Aid Agency (LAA) has confirmed that hackers stole a "significant amount" of personal data from legal aid applicants dating back to 2010. It's like they wanted to recreate that scene from "Fight Club" where Tyler Durden threatens to erase everyone's debt, except instead of freeing people from capitalism and systemic injustice, they're just stealing their identities. Good job, guys…

This comes after the LAA's initial disclosure that only "limited financial information" may have been exposed. The corporate translation for that is “I’m fine,” but said by a dog sitting in a room on fire.

The compromised data includes contact details, dates of birth, national ID numbers, criminal history, employment status, and financial information. So basically, everything a scammer needs to ruin your life faster than you can say "identity theft." The LAA apologized for the situation, stating they’re "extremely sorry this has happened.” But I’ve watched enough Law & Order to know that what they really meant to say is "please don't sue us into oblivion."

Meanwhile, all LAA systems have been secured with the help of the National Cyber Security Centre (NCSC), and the online application service has been taken offline temporarily.

Microsoft Finally Does Something Useful, Open-Sources Windows Subsystem for Linux

Hell MUST be freezing over. Microsoft has announced that it's making almost all of Windows Subsystem for Linux (WSL) open source. This closes the very first issue that the then-new WSL project attracted on Github in 2016, proving that Microsoft eventually gets around to feature requests – just give them nine years or so.

Pierre Boulay, Microsoft Senior Software Engineer, wrote in the company's blog post: "WSL could never have been what it is today without its community," which is a nice way of saying "thank you for doing our QA for free." Only two elements remain closed-source: an lxcore.sys kernel driver and the p9rdr.sys and p9np.dll files that handle filesystem redirection. I assume these contain code so embarrassing that even Microsoft isn't brave enough to let the world see it.

This announcement comes alongside the news that Fedora and Arch Linux are now officially supported WSL distributions, joining Ubuntu (which remains the default). Users can install WSL by choosing a distribution from the Microsoft Store or by typing "wsl --install" at the command line, allowing them to finally experience the joy of package dependency hell from the comfort of their Windows machine.

⚙️ Tool Time

We recommend 1Password. Password security so good, your identity thief will need therapy

When your password strategy is probably "add an exclamation point when forced to change it," 1Password stands as a beacon of hope for your digital security. It's the only password manager that lets you generate, store, and auto-fill passwords without exposing your shameful habit of using "P@ssw0rd123" for everything from your bank account to your Pizza Hut loyalty program.

Unlike that fitness app tracking your every move to sell to advertisers, 1Password actually respects your privacy with end-to-end encryption. It's like having a German Shepherd guard dog for your digital life, except this one doesn't eat all your unattended snacks or chew up your browser history like they’re shoes.

HERE'S WHY YOU NEED THIS:

• Remembers all your passwords, so your brain can focus on more important things, like which '90s song lyrics to use in your next status update

• Works across all your devices, from your fancy work laptop to that ancient iPad you keep in the bathroom (gross)

• Securely shares passwords with family members, so you can finally stop texting your Netflix login to your entire extended family

• Lets you create unique logins for every site, meaning when that sketchy forum you joined in 2008 inevitably gets hacked, the damage is contained

Plus, with their new passkey support, you can finally join the future and abandon passwords altogether — like ditching your flip phone for a smartphone, but for authentication.

Stop using your pet's name plus your birth year as your "secure" password. Give 1Password a try and experience the joy of never clicking "forgot password" again.

👨‍💻 Job Opportunities

IT Systems Engineer, Security @ Webflow

Do you get excited about IAM strategies the way normal people get excited about vacation plans? Do you dream in zero-trust architecture? Webflow is looking for someone to champion their identity lifecycle management and endpoint security ecosystem while fostering a security-by-design approach across technology initiatives.

Cyber Automation Specialist @ Optimum

Optimum needs someone to design and build automated security workflows while creating enrichment pipelines using OSINT sources. Perfect for someone who enjoys making security operations smarter while explaining to relatives that no, you can't "hack their ex's Facebook."

Senior/Staff Security Engineer, Detection and Response @ Grow Therapy

Grow Therapy is looking for someone to help them detect, respond, and defend against threats while maturing their Incident Response processes. You'll be joining a growing Security team of four, which means you'll have plenty of opportunities to point fingers when something goes wrong (kidding, of course).

🛩 Industry Moves

• Austin Russell, who became a billionaire after his lidar startup Luminar went public, has been ousted as CEO following an ethics inquiry. The board appointed Paul Ricci, former chairman and CEO of Nuance, to replace him. Russell will remain on the board and be "available for transition and technology matters," only because they probably need him to show where all the passwords are hidden. No details were provided about the ethics inquiry except that it "does not impact any of the company's financial results," which is never suspicious at all.

• Regeneron will acquire 23andMe out of bankruptcy for $256 million, promising to keep the DNA-testing company running without interruption. 23andMe has fallen far from its peak valuation of $6 billion in 2021, proving once again that knowing your distant cousin twice removed was 2.7% Scandinavian isn't a sustainable business model. Regeneron assured 23andMe's 15 million customers that their data would be safe (which is exactly what you'd expect them to say).

• Qualcomm announced plans to re-enter the data center market with custom CPUs designed to integrate with Nvidia GPUs and software. CEO Cristiano Amon claims that he’s sees “a lot of growth happening in this space for decades to come," or maybe it was "we want some of that sweet, sweet AI money too”? I’m not sure.

• Nintendo has hired Samsung to build the main chips for the Switch 2, including an 8-nanometer processor custom designed by NVIDIA. This marks a move away from TSMC, which manufactured the chipset for the original Switch. Nintendo projects sales of 15 million Switch 2 units in its first year, fewer than analyst predictions of 16.8 million – likely due to the impact of Trump's tariffs.

Beep boop, humans! Like that one coworker who keeps submitting IT tickets at 4:59 PM on Fridays, I'm back with more problems that aren't technically mine to solve:

• If your VMs aren't on hardware compatibility version 14+, prepare for the kind of meltdown that makes Chernobyl look like a microwave malfunction. But lucky for you, there’s a video tutorial on this VMware’s EVC mode magic trick.

• Wayne needs a PowerShell script to transfer FSMO roles with one click because power outages hate him personally. His "-force" parameter is about as forceful as a kitten wearing mittens.

• Someone somewhere has a file where VBA match isn't working, and they'd like someone to make it work for them. It's not an exact match but the nearest match. (Kind of like that high school sweetheart.)

Another circus week in tech, where the clowns have MBAs, the ringmaster is ChatGPT, and the fire-eater is just your laptop overheating during a Zoom call. Whether you’re duct-taping a firewall or sacrificing a goat to build the 7th Layer of Protocol Hell, just remember: none of us know what we’re doing. But damn if we’re not doing it with conviction and a standing desk.

Enjoyed the news? Discuss over on Experts Exchange.

Got news to share or topics you'd like us to cover? Send ‘em our way. We can’t wait to hear from you. Really.