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Space Rescues, Windows Malware, and Microsoft's Remote Breakup
Microsoft's giving Remote Desktop the pink slip while North Korea's installing backdoors... It's been tech's weirdest week.
Hello again!
It's Tuesday, March 18, 2025, and we're in a spacey mood. Exactly 60 years ago, Soviet cosmonaut Aleksei Leonov made history as the first human to walk in space, floating outside the Voskhod 2 spacecraft for a nail-biting 10 minutes while tethered by a single cord. What they don't always mention in the history books? His spacesuit ballooned so much in the vacuum that he nearly couldn't get back inside the airlock. Oof, quite a tight squeeze at 177km above Earth!
Fast forward to today: SpaceX just launched Crew-10 to the ISS, not just for the usual crew swap, but to rescue two NASA astronauts who’ve been stuck in orbit for nine months. That’s right—nine months. Long enough to grow a baby, forget your WiFi password, or become alarmingly good at zero-G pushups.
From “practicing” lunar landings to treating space rescues like an Uber Pool for astronauts, we’ve come a long way.
Microsoft Gives the Old Remote Desktop App Its Walking Papers
Microsoft is pulling the plug on its Remote Desktop app for Windows on May 27th, forcing users into the kind of "work-life severance" that would make Lumon Industries proud. Soon you'll be saying goodbye to your "outie" Remote Desktop app and hello to your new "innie" Windows app experience – just don't expect any waffle parties or wellness sessions if you resist the change.
The new Windows app, launched last September with all the warmth and personality of Harmony Cobel's smile, brings features like multi-monitor support and dynamic display resolutions. But here's the catch – it only works with Microsoft 365 work or school accounts, leaving personal users in a perpetual break room of abandonment.
If you're connecting to Windows 365, Azure Virtual Desktop, or Microsoft Dev Box machines, prepare for your May 27th "severance procedure." Everyone else can continue using the tried-and-true Remote Desktop Connection... for now.
But is this Microsoft's latest step toward "moving Windows fully to the cloud" and enabling "improved AI-powered services"? Probably. Will they eventually deprecate the classic tool with the cold efficiency of Seth Milchick enforcing floor rules? Almost certainly. At least no one's getting locked in a testing floor for non-compliance... we hope.
Nearly 1 Million Windows PCs Caught in the The White Lotus of Cyber Scam
A sophisticated malvertising campaign has ensnared nearly 1 million Windows devices since December, swiping login credentials and crypto faster than guests checking into The White Lotus resort. The attack chain is impressively devious – unsuspecting users clicked malicious ad links that bounced them through several sites before landing at GitHub repositories hosting malware.
This wasn't your garden-variety "You're the 1,000,000th visitor!" scam. Like the multi-layered deceptions at the luxury resort, the malware deployed in four increasingly nasty stages – collecting device info, disabling security, and connecting to command servers more persistently than Tanya McQuoid's spectral presence. It raided browser files and crypto wallets with the efficiency of staff "turning down" your digital belongings.
Movie streaming sites like movies7.net were the main culprits – proving once again that, like guests flirting with their spiritual guides in Thailand, the most dangerous activities often seem like harmless fun. Microsoft Defender now detects these files, but this iceberg might be bigger than all three seasons combined.
North Korea's Malware Hosts Its Own Westworld in Your Android with KoSpy
North Korean hackers have unleashed "KoSpy" – digital hosts as deceptive as Westworld's finest, slipping past Google Play's behavioral analysis like they're passing the Turing test.
Attributed to state-sponsored group APT37 d(think of them as Delos's board of directors), these digital puppeteers have been refining their creation since March 2022, crafting seemingly innocent file managers and security tools that offer a semblance of real functionality.
Like Westworld hosts following their programmed loops, these five apps – "Phone Manager," "File Manager," and their digital brethren – perform their basic tasks while secretly executing a much darker script in the background.
Google has wiped these hosts from the park, but if you've downloaded suspicious utility apps lately, check if you're living in someone else's narrative (aka it might be time for a factory reset – just to be safe). Remember – these violent deletes have violent ends.
⚙️ Tool Time
We recommend Proofpoint.
In a world where 74% of data breaches exploit the human element and 95% of cybersecurity issues trace back to human error, Proofpoint stands as your digital bodyguard against the chaos of human-centric cyberattacks.
Unlike other security platforms that just slap "AI-powered" on their marketing and call it a day, Proofpoint's approach is genuinely comprehensive. Their platform combines two core technologies:
Proofpoint Nexus – their AI ensemble that handles detection
Proofpoint Zen – the user-facing tech that guides your team away from risky behaviors
What makes it actually worth your time? Proofpoint excels at covering the entire threat attack chain:
Pre-delivery detection using ML and large language models
Post-delivery analysis with behavioral monitoring
Click-time protection powered by threat intelligence
The platform also goes beyond basic email security:
Email security (they're industry leaders here)
Cloud security protection
Endpoint defense
Information security
****The proof is in the pudding as 85% of Fortune 100 companies are already on board. Plus they've been recognized as a Gartner Magic Quadrant Leader for Email Security Platforms in 2024
So if you're tired of watching your users click on every suspicious link that lands in their inbox, maybe it's time to add some Zen to your security posture.
Have a suggestion for next week’s tool time? Let us know!
👨💻 Job Opportunities
Iowa needs an Angular expert to bring its tax system into the 21st century. If you can refactor legacy code like Loki rewriting the sacred timeline, and mentor junior devs like Master Splinter training the Ninja Turtles, this gig is for you.
If PCB layouts and signal integrity make your heart race faster than a Fast & Furious drag race, NVIDIA wants you. The legendary chipmaker needs a Cadence APD/SiP wizard who can break out substrates like they’re escaping Shawshank.
You thought mainframes were dead? Think again—like ‘Friends’ reruns, they’re never going away. MRoads need an ALS and LPS pro to keep loan origination and payment processing running smoothly. Think of it as keeping the financial world from turning into a Black Mirror episode
🛩 Industry Moves
The EU is raising $20B to build four “AI gigafactories,” a plan with the grandiosity (and financial risk) of a Gemstone family expansion—100,000 high-end chips per site, as excessive as Jesse Gemstone’s diamond-crusted cross collection. But with US Nvidia chip bans, power shortages, and no major European cloud services to use them, this might be the tech equivalent of a mega-church with no believers—leaving taxpayers asking, “What’s happening right now?
Apple rushed updates for a critical WebKit vulnerability affecting iPhones and iPads that let attackers break out of security sandboxes. It's the Walter White of security flaws – seemingly harmless on the outside but dangerous enough to make Apple "say my name" in their security bulletins.
TSMC pitched Nvidia, AMD and others about taking stakes in a joint venture to run Intel's troubled foundry division. It's just like Logan Roy forcing his kids to rescue a failing media division – everyone's involved, nobody's happy, and the F-bombs are flying behind closed doors.
D-Wave's claim that its quantum computer achieved supremacy over classical machines is facing pushback from physicists with newer methods. Classic Don Draper move – making a bold presentation about changing the advertising game while Sterling Cooper's competitors are already implementing the same idea with better execution.
💽 Data Upload
Our EE community's been busy solving the real problems this week:
And that's a wrap! If you take one thing away from this week, let it be this: Always update your software, never trust a sketchy Google Play app, and don’t get stranded in space without a return ticket.
...And if you made it this far, you can tell we’re TV obsessed. Shoot us a reply and tell us – what are you watching these days? We want to know.
Enjoyed the news? Discuss over on Experts Exchange.
Got news to share or topics you'd like us to cover? Send ‘em our way. We can’t wait to hear from you. Really.